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November 9, 1998 NEXT HOTSHEET: D'OH! C.K.L.'S HOTSHEET *WHAT NON-AARDVARKS ARE PONDERING THIS WEEK... |
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01 OLIVER STONE Hollywood's resident crackpot is making a TV movie about the crash of TWA Flight 800. What's his take? One word: Castro.02 TELEVISION A Stanford study suggests that watching music videos aggravates teenage drinking. A follow-up study will be sponsored by Sprite. Obey your MTV.03 THE TREE After a brief stay in Berkeley, the costume for the Stanford band's mascot has been returned safely. (If it weren't for those meddling kids, they might have gotten away with it.)04 HDTV The new digital television broadcasts started last week. Didn't both of you notice?05 JESSE "THE BODY" VENTURA The former pro wrestler is now governor of Minnesota. Ah, the power of democracy...06 HACKERS Those darned Canadians stole a bunch of passwords from Stanford computer systems. Why isn't the Border Patrol doing its job?07 SPACE BEAR The first Japanese woman in space is running a contest to name her lab assistant, the first Japanese teddy bear in space.08 DAVID BOWIE The insane rocker is running a song writing contest on his web site.09 STAR WARS The much-anticipated trailer for the new movie will debut in the United States on November 20. Start saving those pennies, you drooling fanboy, you.10 NEWT GINGRICH The Speaker of the House won't be running for another term, even though he's "confident he would have won", and sources say he even plans to resign from Congress. I think it has something to do with The Cigarette Smoking Man.
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*
with apologies to Jim Mullen |
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